Night of the Jimmy

I sat down to watch Jimmy Anderson take his 10 wickets tonight.

Fox Sports, using the wisdom of the great Rupert Murdoch, didn’t have the cricket on.

In protest I watched Ed Wood.

And the parables were seemingly non existent.

Jimmy Anderson, like Ed Wood had a dream.

His dream was to take 10 wickets, Ed’s dream was to make his own Citizen Kane.

Jimmy and Ed both had a group of well meaning freaks around them, urging them to greatness, but ultimately it was Ed and Jimmy who would have to provide the speactuacular work.

Ed and Jimmy had people who were in the public eye pushing their cause, for Ed it was Criswell and Vampira, Jimmy had Bumble and David Gower.

Jimmy and Ed had to scale amazing heights, jimmy to take all 10 wickets wile Sidebottom the stroppy was at the other end, Ed to make a brilliant film with his lead actor buried and a chiropractor in his place.

Ed and Jimmy had their detractors, but the people closest to them believed in them, dopey fucktards that they were.

Jimmy and Ed were both ultimately brought down by the one thing that stops most people from becoming great, a lack of talent.

Their dreams were just to big for their stomachs.

Ed was obviously the more successful one, as he made plan 9 from outer space.

Jimmy only took 7 wickets against the Kiwis.

On a completely unrelated note I think Jimmy Anderson would make a great Glen or Glenda in the remake of “I changed my sex”.

If you don't believe me, think of a cricketer who would look better in an angora sweater.

Exactly.

Personally my favourite Ed wood movie is Plan 9 from outer space, although I do like the irony of making a film called Bride of the monster and not really having a monster or a mock wedding.www.cricketwithballs.com

Now with new proper english lady blogger.