Friday, June 20, 2008

Windies - Aus Elevenses: not-so-live blog

Hello! Welcome to my report on the first Twenty20 in the Carribean.

This is not a live blog, as the match has already finished, but I'm watching what I recorded earlier on Sky+, and thought I'd document the experience for those Australians who are comfortably asleep, and also those non-Aussies who actually have a life and have gone out on this Friday night, instead of working late and then going home to watch cricket on your own with a bowl of noodles and a bottle of cava.

So. Rain! Game is reduced to 11 overs a side. Ooh, fewer to blog. Windies win the toss and put the Aussies in to bat.

Mark Wedderburn is in the studio, and he's got Jason Gillespie with him. Jason's looking SHARP. Mark has already said twice within 1 minute that Gillespie has a "very recognisable face". That's up there with "very striking-looking" for damning with faint praise.

The Windies are captained by Bravo and have some debutantes: Andre "Who?" Fletcher, William "Who?" Perkins and Kemar "Who? but good name, dude!" Roach. Aussies have caps for Shane "IPL" Marsh, and Luke "Pronounced Wrong-Key" Ronchi. Also playing is David "Who? [only kidding, Jrod!]" Hussey. Oh, Cameron white is there too. Someone who visits cricketwithballs via google REALLY wants to know about his girlfriend.

Oh no, Wedderburn keeps referring to Stuart Marsh. Holy hell, man! I could honest to GOD do a better job, and I'd bet I'd undercut you on price! Sky, you're all about the money aren't you? Book me! and I fill so many minority demographics, your HR department are gonna die from pleasure.

My favourite groundsman with the long dreads is there. Yay! Who remembers him from the World Cup final, having to replace the circle markers when it became clear that play had to continue?

Wedderburn and Gillespie are talking between themselves. I'm forwarding past this, because I don't think I can bear it.

Ah, CRICKET!!!

Australian Innings:

[b]OVER 1:[/b] Taylor bowling. Marsh facing. If we were playing drinking games, it would definitely be "down 2 fingers" for every mention of Shaun Marsh's father. Bowlers have a max of 2 each, btw, except for 1 who can bowl 3. SIX!! Huge hit straight down the ground. 9 - 0.

[b]OVER 2:[/b] Sulieman Benn, the spinner, bowling. The spinner! Gosh he's tall. Ronchi looks suspiciously unibrow. NObody to move the sightscreen but Ronchi's not bothered. Excellent over from Benn, 12 - 0.

[b]OVER 3:[/b] Taylor bowling, Ronchi facing. SIX!!! 76 metres. FOUR! The commentator has obv just been handed a Ronchi fact-sheet cos he's reeling them off. FOUR!! then a big LBW shout, not given, missing leg. 3 dots in a row. 26 - O.

[b]OVER 4:[/b] Benn back. Marsh on strike. The commentators reckon Bravo doesn't know the rules re powerplays in reduced over games and are imploring "somebody" to tell him that the powerplay is over and he can move out his fielders. Marsh and then Ronchi take advantage of this. FOUR! FOUR! FOUR! 42 - 0.

[b]OVER 5:[/b] The dugout are signalling "3!" to Bravo to signal that they messed up the field placings in the last over. New bowler: Fidel Edwards and O NOES!! he's slipped when just about to deliver the ball. We saw that already in the tests, first ball he bowled then too. He's up, he's ok. Good stuff from Fidel. 47 - 0.

[b]OVER 6:[/b] Local boy Kemar Roach is in. Full toss, Ronchi recoils, falls to his knees. DROPPED! Good ball, quick, up in the air but Ramdin fails to hold it. FOUR! then Ronchi hits it down and WICKET!!!!! Roach gets one in his first over! Ronchi c Taylor b Roach, 36, off 22 balls. New bat: Shane Watson (calm DOWN ladies!). 57 - 1.

[b]OVER 7:[/b] Fidel stays on. Keeps it tidy. FOUR!! off the last ball of the over 65 - 1.

They're advertising some Saffer wine-in-a-box in the breaks. I'm not judging, I'm just saying. Well, I'm silently judging, in the privacy of my own home.

[b]OVER 8:[/b] Roach continues. Looks pretty quick, this guy. Then fields well off his own bowling; harsh to call that a dropped caught-and-bowled. SIX! very stylish from Marsh, 98 nmetres. Then... WICKET!! That's brilliant work at the boundary by Xavier Marshall, takes the catch, tricky enough as it is, and then just stops himself from falling onto the rope with some twinklytoed footwork! Marsh b Roach c Marshall 29, off 22 balls. New bat: DAVID HUSSEY!!! COME ON! 72 - 2.

Roach goes off to see to his hand, which was hit hard when he fielded during that over.

[b]OVER 9:[/b] Bravo bowling. Change of pace, and it does for Hussey! WICKET!! David Hussey hits it up in the air, caught Perkins. Out second ball for a duck. O NOES! DAVID! New bat = Cameron White. FOUR! 78 - 3.

[b]OVER 10:[/b] Roach is back, he's the guy being given the third over. FOUR! He does look to have a bit of pace and bounce about him: I like this kid. SIX! Despite (and because of) that six Roach finishes for 3 - 29. 91 - 3.

[b]OVER 11:[/b] Bravo gives it to himself. Keeps it tight, concedes just 6. Aus finish on 97 - 3.

INNINGS BREAK. Wedderburn in the studio makes a painful, painful joke about it being so fast and frantic that Jason Gillespie says he's dizzy. Fast-forward.

Windies Innings. They need 98 at 8.91 runs per over.

[b]OVER 1:[/b] Xavier Marshall and newby William Perkins to open. Bowler is Brett Lee. SIX!!! good start from the Windies. Some VERY audible announcements with the registration numbers of vehicles parked in the wrong place. 9 - 0.

[b]OVER 2:[/b] Mitchell Johnson, with a new haircut. Bounces over Ronchi, FOUR byes. SIX! Marshall again. But then the batsman takes one straight in the nads - ouchie. He manages to run, remarkably. SIX!! onto the roof of the stand. FOUR! streaky. HUGE over. 34 - 0, and the Windies are left needing 64 runs off 54 balls.

[b]OVER 3:[/b] Lee continues. Perkins plays an almost-sitting-down version of the Marilliner shot / Ashraful fine leg scoop over your shoulder shot, and with success. FOUR! and FOUR! creamed away on the offside. Ponting is spitting into his hands and rubbing them together. and FOUR! Straight down the ground, only just missing the non-striker stumps, wonderful stuff from Marshall. The crowd are going crazy! 51 - 0. At this point the Aussies had 26.

[b]OVER 4:[/b] Windies need need 47 off 48. Watson comes to have a bowl. WICKET!!! Misunderstanding, Marshall changes his mind and turns round, not enough time, Watson picks up the ball and throws down the stumps. Marshall run out (Watson) for 36, off 15 balls. Great effort, have brought the Windies right up to a manageable run rate, shame he didn't stick around. New bat: Ramdin. 56 - 1.
[b]OVER 5:[/b] Windies need 42 off 42. James Hopes is brought into the attack. Audible snick that I heard first time off Perkins, but which nobody questions. Oh the commentator has picked up on it. WICKET!!! run out. Perkins seeks a quick single, doesn't get to the other end in time, good sliding-falling-aiming-at-one-stump throw from Ponting. Perkins goes for 9, off 11 balls.
[b]OVER 6[/b]: This brings in ... Dwayne Bravo. Watson continues. FOUR! WICKET!!! Ramdin b Watson c Johnson, diving catch, 8 off 6 balls. New bat: Andre Fletcher. 65 - 3.
[b]OVER 7:[/b] Windies need 33 off 3o. Cameron White is on! Bowling to Bravo. SIX!!! White is struggling a little. Windies are well ahead of the rate. 75 - 3.
[b]OVER 8:[/b] Windies need 23 off 24, and Mitchell Johnson comes back in. SIX! Lucky outside edge from Bravo, totally clears Brett Lee on the boundary. Windies steal a single off a miss-field, after a close run-out call. 85 - 3.
[b]OVER 9:[/b] Windies need 13 off 18. Should be easy. Hopes is back. FOUR!! Bravo is looking to administer the smackdown here and bring it home. The crowd are loving this! FOUR!! The Windies dugout are loving it too! Do you know who's not loving it? Ricky Ponting, who has his serious face on. 96 - 3
[b]OVER 10:[/b] Windies need 2 off 12. Shane Watson is bowling. Bravo faces. And... SIX!!!!! Bravo finishes it in some style! Windies finish on 102 - 3.

IT'S ALL OVER! Windies win the first ever Twenty2o International in the Carribean. Xavier Marshall takes a lot of credit for getting the Windies off to a flier at the start so that they never dropped behind the run rate.
Man of the Match: for his catch and for his batting, Xavier Marshall.

Back to the studio, where there's an awful lot of nonsense being talked about what this MEANS, and flawed comparisons to the Aussie's Twenty2o loss in England in 2005.
I'll finish with a gem from Gillespie: "11 overs, it's a bit of an unknown quantity isn't it". www.cricketwithballs.com

Now with new proper english lady blogger.

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