first test first session - pace pace pace

Just before South Africa took the field I had a quick interview with Graeme Smith and Mickey Arthur.

Hi guys how are you?

GS: We’re really pace, can’t wait pace get in pace and get pace out.
MA: We are pace that we pace the players pace win this pace.

Graeme, do you see Morne Morkel as a future Austin Powers villain?

GS: I don’t pace Mike Myers pace making those pace anymore, Morne pace going to pace a villain pace “the Love Pace”, but the pace was crap.

Mickey, are you so fine?

MA: Oh yeah, pace pretty funny pace you dickhead.

And then the both walked away.

Weird.

Then South Africa went out and bowled, slow.

You can blame the pitch if you want.

But South Africa looked as potent as a well hung Eunuch.

Ntini was trying to bowl a metre or so wide of off stump.

Steyn was held back, not sure why, he wasn't bowling much wider than Ntini.

Morkel bowled quicker than the others, but it wouldn’t give you nightmares.

And Kallis bowled way more overs than anyone behind him would have wanted.

Strauss looked fairly solid, the voodoo doll his poor wife was using obviously wasn’t affecting him.

Cook, not so much.

The England won the session by a distance, but I don't think I'll be reliving in my dreams for days to come.www.cricketwithballs.com

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