Stanford is here, and so is Jrod, Stanfording it up all over the place. This is my QBQ, as the magic happens, having never seen a Stanford event before i will be rating every little thing.
Feel free to comment, not just about cricket, it could be anything, seen any good films recently? Refresh as you want, or wait for my little counter thing to do so for you.
7/121 19 overs
Taylor back on.
Cooper is in by the way.
And he smashes one though covers in calypso style.
For those who don't know, Cooper has a stutter step in his bowling.
Cooper tries to get himself out, Taylor bowls a slower one, and Cooper shuffles across and misses it, and it bounces inches over the stumps. It was much funnier than i desribed.
OUT
Ran outside off again, and hit plumb in front by a quick one.
Taufel gives it out, and Rudi agrees.
Ravi Rampaul in.
6/116 18 overs
Dave back on.
He starts with a wide full one and Ramdin swipes it over cover.
Positive they said Dave Mohammed was a finger spinner before, he is definitely a leggie, and that would explain the weird action i said before.
OUT
Ramdin runs himself out, ramdin had to take them on, but the game is over now.
13 off 7.
Tried to steal a second, but the security camera caught him.
Should have been another run out next ball, but Dave couldn't take the ball.
No chance of a team hattrick now.
Shame.
5/108 17 overs
OUT
Cozier sticks up for Patty, ofcourse, and on Q Patty (Guillen) finds the only man whose balls don't drop to quickly Darren Sammy.
Powell the bowler.
He made 31 off 43, but he does look like a find, just not a 2020 find.
Ramdin looks good slapping a lofted cover drive to the fence/rope/boundary.
Was it a good move getting Patty out?
4/98 16 overs
Dave Mohammed back on.
Stewart charges down and then plays a push while doing the splits and some how gets back into the crease.
Insane batting, but nice split.
Stewart hits one straight up in the air, Pollard gets under it, and the ball, because it is white, drops quicker than he expects and it rebounds off his hands for 8 yards.
OUT
Darren Sammy, he of the brilliantly shaped head catches another slog, maybe his balls didn't drop as fast.
Am i infact still talking about cricket.
26 by Stewart, more huff than puff really.
Ramdin in.
Anon says, "Can Stewart run out this Paty guy."
I assume the message will come out saying that shortly.
3/94 15 overs
Taylor back on, Joseph going in for the kill.
Patty is 27 off 39, he looks really good though, reminds me of a young Shaun Marsh, before he bulked up and could force his way out of slow pitches.
Daylight savings end tonight in London, extra hour of sleep in, awesome, I had an early film at 3pm to see tomorrow.
3/87 14 overs
TnT can only win if someone like Stewart goes nuts.
Pollard has bowled a lot of full tosses, and this one is a real one, straight at the chest and he gets warned.
Patty Hearst needs to hit out, or run himself out here.
Compared to the ICL games, this crowd is on Lithium.
Pollard's stock ball is actually the full toss, and he almost gets another wicket from one, the fielder yet again rolls onto it with his nuts.
The SS boys are going to be sore if this is their standard fielding technique.
Stewart hits another six, Pollard must feel aggrieved as it was one of his few balls to hit the surface.
Pollard is a freak though, he was called for a no ball, and hell the ball in his hand, that is amazing.
Bowlers who can do that should become the captain's pet.
3/75 13 overs
This Dave guy has a weird technique, I can't really explain it well, but its odd, trust me.
Stewart pinched that one off the island.
Stuffed up a good voer by Dave, and Stewart follows it up with a beautifully ugly slog.
3/63 12 overs
Stanford has the common touch, as he tries to molest a mans flag when the man doesn't swing it enough.
Then he walks around and shakes hands like a dullard politician.
FUCK ME
I think he just kissed a baby, and now he is telling her how pretty she is, this is excruciating and hilarious at the same time, Pommie and Nasser are letting the orange shirted man have his time in awestruck silence.
He has such a awkward manner with people.
Patty Hearst is killing TnT's run rate here.
3/59 11 overs
Dave Mohammed is on, great first/last name combination.
Dave bowls that one very well.
Spinners are the ones on this surface.
I do hope Swann plays and buys a pink car, even a pink prius would be great.
3/56 10 overs
The SS bowling must be weak seeing that Pollard is on.
OUT
Pollard bowls a full toss, Ganga tries to play it straight, always a mistake with full tosses, and picks out long on.
He amde 13.
Navin Stewart is in, may have been sent in as a pinch hitter.
2/52 9 overs
Ganga is scoring singles easy enough.
Patty tries reverse sweep and ends up with an unsuccessful appeal for Benn.
Benn bowls a corker.
A glitch in the appeal system is there. At anytime the 3rd umpire can use technology and say a dismissal is out, even when a batsmen is out.
However, If Benn's appeal was out, but given not out, the 3rd umpire wouldn't have time to overturn it by the time Benn comes in for the next ball.
And I'm over half way into a bottle of bourbon.
2/47 8 overs
Pollard is on, starts with a very slow wide.
His balls are not bouncing at all, until the third one where Pollard bends his back, good to see his as just as lazy when he bowls as when he bats.
The crowd sound effects CD has been turned off.
I like this Patty kid, but he is 11 from 22, he needs to step up.
He gets a two off the last one, that is something.
Bumble likes the gym, that is Bumble's second mention of the gym, perhaps he got a free massage.
Happy ending?
2/43 7 overs
Benn is bowling well, and 6 foot 15, he is hard to get away.
He bowled a few over 100 Ks.
Run rate over 8 an over now.
Dave says, "Will there be a drinking game for the 20/20 for 20?"
There may be a drinking game for it, but there won't be a OBO, or QBQ for it.
It will include a drink for everytime some praises the conditions, and down your drink everytime Stanford is shown wearing an orange shirt. .
2/39 6 overs
Where did all the bounce come from, Powell is flying through and bowling slower than rampaul.
Patty has a nice technique, i like him.
lots of excuses for the poor fielding, including one Bumble and I found funny, the white ball drops qcuiker than a read one, how long have they been using a white ball for?
Powell bowls a good one.
2/34 5 overs
Sulimenn Benn is on, he is great he is, he tried to trip Brad Haddin.
OUT
3rd ball he uproots the stump, with are obviously spring loaded if a left arm orthy can do that.
Perkins is out, this will test TnT from here.
Darren ganga in now, he captained well, lets see how he goes, his batting is not suited to band and/or crash.
Very good first over Benn, alas, no trippings.
Smithy says, "Is it halloween already, have you seen some of the costumes?" npot a bad call, there is some weird facial masks out there.
1/30 4 overs
The SS bowlers are getting alot more bounce, the keeper, whatever his name is, just had one go through his gloves due to the bounce.
Perkins smashes Powell through covers, he has taken control and TnT look much better now, especially as Dowlin drops him.
Another pull shot, and Dowlin almost rolls his groin directly over it.
Cozier loves this Patty Guillen kid, cannot stop mentioning his whole family history.
A more cynical person may say he is talking u the white kid.
Not me though.
1/25 3 overs
Curtly's hair is simply exquisite.
Hopefully I am calling it correctly, a dreadlocked mo hawk.
4 leg byes.
The great Wes Hall is their as well, 2 out of 3 of my all time favourite quickies. And since the Demon Fred Spofforth is dead, there is little chance of him being there.
Perkins gets a short one and dispatches it over midwicket nicely.
Patty gets away a four as well, looks like he is a real batsmen.
Ceci says. "Nas is really doing the Stanford PR job isn't he - constantly rabbiting on about the money, praising the ground, the dancers, the entertainment..."
Nasser is winning the brown nose award, but probably only because Pommie hasn't been on the air much.
1/10 2 overs
Powell at the other end, so at least some of the first stringers turned up.
Four from the first ball.
Have i mentioned Patty Hearst (Guillen) is white?
And where is Brendan Nash?
Patty edges and it falls short of second.
TnT look much more nervy with the bat than they did with the ball.
The bats are just dipped in paint, it looks so shit house, and is so lofi.
Patty hit a couple of goodlooking drives, but straight to fielders.
1/4 1 over
William Perkins and Lendl Simmons are facing up to jerome taylor.
Taylor is at 95 miles 150 odd ks, can't be right can it?
OUT
Simmons gets a cracker from Taylor, and is cuaght behind nit a good start for TnT.
Justin Guillen, known as Patty Hearst, is in, and taylor bolws a quick bouncer to finish the over and scare him.
Great start for the SS.
See what i did there, you see its the stanford superstars.
Yeah, SS.
Ceci says, "I love Simon Taufel, nearly as much as I love Harmy, but I do not think purple is his colour - and why do I get the feeling that all the spectators are in fact employees of Stanford?" Why indeed...
TnT did well, but i think 146 might end up being enough.
For the break you can watch an Australian stunt legend.
5/146 20 overs
Stutter stepping Cooper is on.
First ball is a play and miss.
Next one is a swipe for si over mid wicket.
And then another play and miss.
Single squeezed.
Joseph back on strike.
Slice over point for 2.
Great last shot, charged down the wicket and flicks it to fine leg for four.
45 off 31 for Jospeh, played very well.
5/133 19 overs
Stewart back on to finish at this end.
FUCK ME.
Stewart drops short, and Pollard absolutely fucken smacks the shit out of it with a pull shot into the swimming pool.
Huge.
Great camera work to pick up the splash.
Now i know why he never worries about running.
OUT
Stewart gets his length wrong again, but Pollard misses it and is bowled.
Lindon James in.
24 off 14 to Pollard, he is value for money to watch.
OUT
Another bad length ball but James misses it and is bowled for 2.
Stewart has bowled an extremely lucky over.
Dave Mohammed is in.
2/11 off that over.
3/122 18 overs
Joseph hits Sherwin Ganga onto a roof.
Pollard gets pad or bat down the legside, Ramdin takes it down well, and Steve Davis is talking to Rudi, its all so exciting.
This is what we at CWB call Sodomized down the legside, and we think all of them should be not out.
Not out.
That took forever. Nasser disagrees.
With all that waiting Pollard loses all of his composure and slogs straigh to mid on and the 3rd drop happens.
Rampaul almost head butts it.
4 byes to finish with, i think.
3/110 17 overs
Pollard has abandoned technique.
Running still not his thing.
Pollard finally plays a real shot, and smacks it back over Bachan's head, for four.
10 off that.
Need at least that for the next 3.
3/100 16 overs
Ravi rampaul is back, ganga can captain, he is going for another wicket.
TnT need a direct hit, but nada, Pollard looks uninterested in running.
He squeezes a slap off his pads for four, see no running.
Outfield is slow, a couple have been slapped and have just stopped dead, Tony agrees with me.
Anything over 140 could work for Stanford.
Rampaul ends up with 0/16, top effort.
3/93 15 overs
Bachan, the lefty ortho switches end.
OUT
Dowlin slogs out for 35 off 37. Straight up in the air.
Kieron Pollard is in, he was talked up as a huge hitter against Australia, but i don't think he hit any.
And he starts off by trying to run out Joseph.
Rudi says not out, and takes forever to do so on a fairly straight forward one.
Very good over for TnT.
2/89 14 overs
Cooper, a medium pacer, is on.
Oh my, he has a stutter step in his run up, its a fucken moonwalk actually.
How does he get to the crease?
He is an actual skeleton as well.
Very good over for the stutter moon walking one, full and straight, just how Tony likes it.
2/84 13 overs
Sherwin Ganga, an offie, is on.
He gets a top edge out to backward sqaure leg, abut another drop from poor fielding, even though the commentators keep takling about the great fielding.
It sounds like the commentators are coming out of the PA.
Big slog off the last ball of the over, Jospeh heaves it for 6, 12 off that.
Smithy says "You haven't mentioned the stripe on the pads yet."
No, but you have.
2/71 12 overs
Bachan bowls a much better over, but in 2020 cricket that doesn't mean much, and he gets put into a tent.
Dowlin is up to 29, and got warned for running on the pitch.
The umpires have Ron Jeremy Purple shirts on.
2/60 11 overs
TnT are right in this, shame they dropped that catch.
Pommie is commentating, why am I surprised.
The pitch does look tough to score on, timing is hardcore at the moment.
I say that as Dowlin plays the ugliest shot i have seen in a long time, a cover drive almost off the back foot calypso style if you will that goes over the bowlers head.
Sylvestor Joseph is the new batsmen, sorry, but it was a hattrick over and the bourbon is catching up to me.
Runrate slowly improving, but the batting doesn't look too good from here.
Not many actual superstars in there.
2/50 10 overs
Rishi Bachan is on, left arm orthodox.
Has a silly point, ganga has nuts.
Less spin than the leggie so far, bowls a short one and is crunched over deep midwicket where Patty hearst dives over it.
Dowlin is slowly moving in to his innings, lucky this isn't a 2020.
9 off it.
2/41 9 overs
This over isn't as exciting, no leggies.
Stewart looks quick enough, and hasn't given any real bad balls to them.
DROPPED
Perkins drops Dowlin at mid off, should have been taken, perhaps his blingy chain got in his way.
2/37 8 overs
Badree will finish up his 4.
He has done very well.
OUT.
And with that he beats Fletcher in flight had has him caught at deep mid on.
Fletcher our for 25, Sarwan in.
Was a blatant slog, but was still bowled quite well.
OUT
Clean bowled with a straight one first nut, Sarwan was nowhere near it, and my man Badree is on fire.
Hattrick?
There is a silly mid off, and he bowls a wide down the leg, like me on most of my hattrick.
Last ball he almost gets another one when he leaves a wrongun and the keeper squeals rather than taking it.
0/33 7 overs
A first gamer by the name of Navin Stewart.
First ball he gets a ball chipped back over his head and does a weird clapping jump thing to show he would have caught it had he been within 3 foot of it.
The pitch is low and skiddy, i know this because it's obvious and because it has been mentioned 67 times already.
Fletcher looks good, i think he did alright against Australia this year, he flicked a ball beautifully behind square for four.
16 off the last two, if they keep Lfetcher up the right end this could be good.
0/25 6 overs
Stanford is wearing a subtle orange shirt.
First six to Fletcher, he uses his feet well to badree the leggie and puts it back over his head.
Stanford need a ten plus over now, this should be a bowling change.
0/17 5 overs
Ganga is miced up, and was asked id he could hear anything to which he replied i can't hear anything.
Brilliant, the whole ground heard it as it appeared to be broadcast from the ground speakers.
The black bats look dirty with the white marks on them, perhaps the umpires should have clothes on them since they aren't really umpiring this match.
Rampaul has let 9 runs off 3 overs, great effort.
The Stanford mob better get their fingers out.
0/13 4 overs
The leggie is doing a good job, why did Bryce never do this for Victoria?
He even appealed for an LB when the batsmen charged down the wicket at him, a true leggie.
Anon said "These uniforms are very demur, the opposite to the ICL."
Good point.
0/11 3 overs
Rampaul looks proper impressive. According to Cozier he is quick and sharp.
How is rampaul not playing for the Windies.
Guillen, a 12 year old playing for TnT, is a former kidknap victim, remind me to call him Patty Hearst later on.
Not much goes on in the over, except a swipe for two at the end of the over.
0/8 2 overs
Samuel Badree is opening for TnT from the other end, HE IS A LEGGIE, awesome.
Hope it goes better for me than it ever did for me.
He is bowling Afridi type deliveries, but they are straightening.
By the way Andre Fletcher and Travis Dowlin are opening up for Stanford.
They are saying he isn't runing them, but he is, dickheads.
He finishes up with one short one and FLetcher cracks it behind point.
0/2 1 over
Ravi Rampaul to bowl the first over, they seem to be wearing flares.
Chris Gayle was caught smiling again, did anyone check this sotry before it was aired?
Cozier in the box, and Bumble, awesome.
The speedo can't be right, this guy just clocked 88 miles 143 k's, actually he might be, he looks impressive, 3 balls in.
Black bats look stupid, just a thought.
This guy looks like he can bowl, he cut that back a mile and this pitch has been rolled for 40 hours straight, by a disabled altar boy*.
*Possibly not true.
Very good first over for TnT.
22:30
TnT have come out in their training tops, what a mistake, no sorry, that is their uniform, as the Stanford XI are weiring a similar kit.
22:29
TnT have a player named Sherwin Ganga, it's like he is a mutant version of two ordinary West Indian openers.
22:28
Not saying anyone is lying, but there was just a shot of Chris Gayle smiling with ex champions of West Indian Cricket, including Ambrose with the best hair style ever.
22:26
Mike Haysman is there, lucky us, Darren Ganga, T&T's skipper wins the toss and bowls. Apparently the entire world is watching this game, does that make my QBQ redundant?
Haysman asks about why Gayle is out, and then Sylvester Jospeh's answer makes him a little uncomfortable, he moves on with panache.
22:20
Ian Ward starts off the broadcast, not really 20 million worth now is it.
Allot and Ward have discussed all the facilities at the ground, with all the grace and skill of a used car salesman.
Stanford must be ecstatic, gayle and Shiv are out, Gayle for personal family problems , he has a family?
Game hasn't come on the telly yet, it's Trinidad Vs the Stanford Realtors of Texas XI.
Goodnews is it looks like my down load of razorback, is flying through.
For those who don't know, 'Razorback' is a film about a wild boar who attacks people in the outback, a classic of exploitation i haven't seen since i was a little boy, but i just saw 'Not Quite Hollywood' which is all about Ozploitation and i thought Razorback would be an awesome halloween film.www.cricketwithballs.com... We constantly get sodomized down the legside