Paul rubs it in

How do you know you are really struggling against England?

Paul Collingwood makes runs.

India would not have planned for that.

Who would?

This is probably how the team meeting went.

Dhoni: Any plans for their batsmen?

Sachin: I think for Strauss, we should try bowling wide of off stump and tempting him, and changing that with odd fast straight one. With Cook perhaps short balls, and try and keep him pinned down when our spinners come into the attack. For Bell we should restrict his singles and make him face 6 balls in an over. With Kevin I think the best bet is too bowl 2 feet outside off stump and pack the field with short overs and catching men and don’t even get close to feeding his strength. For Freddy the spinners should come on early, and then have an in out field.

Dhoni: Wow, that is pretty thorough.

VVS: Except you forgot Collingwood.

Sachin: Who.

VVS: Paul Collingwood, bats at 5.

Sachin: Oh that ginger fucker, fuck him, he’s a fucken useless cunt, I didn’t even know he was in the side, I mean he can’t bat worth a turd in hell, why the fuck would they even bring him over, do they have a quota for shit cunts in their team or something. I mean fucken hell man, he is an “a” class spazz, and he has fucken red hair, I mean come on, we aren’t really planning on how to get him out, just bowl anyone for fucks sake. Paul fucken Collingwood, serioulsy.

Dhoni: Ooooook, right then, anyone else, Virender?

Sehwag: It’s alright it’s ok.

So it's Sachin's fault.

Ofcourse

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