flem, you're so hot, boom

I would like to congratulate Stephen Fleming on his career ending today.

I think I wrote something eloquent about him when his retirement was forced upon him.

That’s right I compared him to Chomsky and called him a mad scientist to boot, but I meant it in the nicest possible way.

Anyway today is his last innings and he has left us with a beautifully crafted fleming 60 odd.

No man of the modern era has given us more fluent and frustrating starts than Flem.

But unlike other English foreplay bastmen, Fleming turned foreplay into something more thatn what happens before penetration.

Picture a man with no penis, how does he ensure his lady friend is satisfied, well for hours on end, night after night he comes up with a foreplay of exquisite skill, fluid strokes and eye catching follow throughs.

This may not be what all ladies want, but for the Kiwi public, it did the trick time and time again.

Ofcourse that may have been because the rest of the Kiwi batsmen were frigid.

Fleming has kept us interested in New Zealand in a way that only Bad Taste and Flight of the Conchords have managed to better.

So for you Flem, I will reprint the lyrics to the Flight of the Conchords song that reminds me the most of you.

Looking at the room, I can tell that you.
Are the most beautiful girl in the...room.
(In the whole wide room).
And when you're on the street, depending on the street.
I bet you are definitely in the top 3.
Good lookin girls on the street.
(Depending on the streets).
And when I saw you at my man's place.
I thought...what, is she, doing...at my man's place.
How did he get a hottie like that to a party like this?
Good one, Dave.
(Ooh, you're a LEGEND, Dave).

I asked Dave if he's going to move on you.
He's not sure.
"Dave, do you mind if I do?"
He says he doesn't mind.
But I can tell he kind of minds.
But I'm going to do it anyway.

I see you standing all alone by the stereo.
I dim the lights down very low.
You're so beautiful.
You could be a waitress.
You're so beautiful.
You could be a air hostess in the 60s.
You're so beautiful.
You could be a part-time model.
But then I seal the deal, I do my moves.
I do my dance moves.

Lets travel through, just me and you.
As other dudes around you on the dance floor.
I draw you near, lets get out of here.
Lets get in a cab. I'll buy you a kabeb.
I can't believe. I'm sharing a kabeb.
With the most beautiful girl I have ever seen with a kabeb.
Oh, why don't we leave?
Lets go to my house.
We can feel each other up on the couch.
Oh no, I don't mind taking it slow.

Cause you're so beautiful...
Like a tree. Or a high class prostitute.
You're so beautiful.
You could be a part time model.
But you'd probably still have to keep your normal job.
A part time model.
Spend part of your time modeling.
And part of your time next to me.

That’s right flem, you are the most beautiful batsmen in the whole wide team.www.cricketwithballs.com "Gee, Andre, what are we going to do tonight?"