Adam Holliaoke, Alan Mullally, and Craig White are obviously all champions of English cricket.
Holliaoke was the best English captain since Grace.
Mullaly was the best left arm bowler ever.
And Craig White was probably the best allrounder England has had since Tony Greig.
Because of the trail blazing path these 3 heroes made, England has yet again looked to Victoria to find a champion.
This time it is Darren “eyelids†Pattinson.
The man, who was on a rooftop in Dandenong 12 months ago, is now leading the county league tally with an impressive 15 wickets after just 8 matches.
The rub is that Eyelids has an English passport, which means he can play for the old dart if they ask him nicely.
For England’s quota system, 3 non english accented players per team, Pattinson is perfect.
It’s been a while since Mullally took the new ball for England; so let me give the English some new tips on how to handle their new Victorian recruit.
You will need more than one Victorian bowler, because the first one will get injured thinking about bowling. The second one will get injured thinking about replacing the first one, so best you have 3.
Then you will need Rodney Hogg to psyche him up in his mentalist’s chamber known as the lunacy room. No Victorian can bowl fast without some time alone with Rodney.
After that you need a keeper who can dive in front of first slip. For Victorian bowlers this is like viagra.
And finally you will need to be a good team on paper, that never wins anything, oh good; you’ve got that covered already.
Usually I would be angry at England for poaching our Eyelids, but as long as they leave Dirty Dirk alone, it’s ok by me.
After all, Fast bowlers grow on trees here, we don't even have to go into modelling agencies to find them, like they do in the UK.www.cricketwithballs.com
Now with new proper english lady blogger.
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