Thursday, September 25, 2008

Imran, take a bow you alice banded freak

Sorry Durham fans, I jumped the gun.

I had already written off Imran Tahir.

In my defence i would like to say that i was completely justified, he was bowling garbage.

Rancid lettuce, stinky tomatoes, fermented mayonnaise, decaying bananas, you know, garbage.

Then he bowled a spell that would have given a nun a hot flush, a eunuch a stiffy, a republican a reason to use their gun, had any of them understood leg spin.

Not udnerstood, dug legspin, i mean raelly feel legspin.

The sort of person who teaches his girlfriend leg spin with an apple.

If you had some a deep emotional and sexual connection with leg spin Tahir's spell was free hardcore porn with no download limits.

Wrong uns, flippers, toppies, and sliders were all used, and he took Notts from championship to calamity.

Twas a beautiful moment.

Swanny had a top spinner so vicious if it were a cobra he would be dead.

Mark Ealham missed a flipper that made Clarrie Grimmett want to come back from the dead mount Tahir from behind and then bowl at the other end.

Andre Adams didn’t even get a chance to get angry as he missed a wrong un so delicious you could taste it.

If Mark Nicholas were here, he would have judged it britians top meal.

And Eyelids was just not up to the magic as another perfectly placed wrong un cannoned into the stumps like a thirsty child jumping into a lake in the desert.

It was like watching a how to bowl leg spin and fuck people over video.

Once Patel was out, that was it, the genie came out of the bottle wearing high heels and no knickers.

Tahir excited me more in 4 overs than Danish Kaneria has in his whole career.

This spell was the equivalent of heroin for an addict, or a willing 12 year old boy for a priest.

Imran, it has been a while since I have done this, but you deserve it.
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